WEST GERMANY THE ADIPOSE SOCIETY SINCE THE DAYS WHEN HITLER OPTED FOR 
GUNS RATHER THAN BUTTER, WEST GERMANY HAS KNOWN NEAR-STARVATION, AUSTERITY AND, 
FOR THE PAST DECADE, SUCH HEADY ABUNDANCE THAT TODAY IT HAS 
BECOME THE ADIPOSE SOCIETY . FOLLOWING THE EARLY '50S, WHEN THE 
POSTWAR BOOM SET OFF WHAT GERMANS CALL THE EDELFRESSWELLE, THE GORGEOUS 
GOBBLING WAVE, BUTTOCKS AND BOSOMS HAVE EXPANDED EVEN MORE RAPIDLY THAN 
THE ECONOMY, AND DOCTORS HAVE RECOGNIZED TWO UNIVERSAL AILMENTS : DOPPELKINNEPIDEMIE, 
DOUBLE-CHIN EPIDEMIC, AND HANGEBAUCH, OR BELLYHANG . THE MAJORITY OF GERMANS, 
FROM NEWBORN BABES TO CABINET MINISTERS, ARE FATTER TODAY THAN AT 
ANY OTHER TIME IN THIS CENTURY . A TOP DIETETIC AUTHORITY 
ESTIMATES THAT 20 PER CENT OF ALL WEST GERMANS ARE OVERWEIGHT 
. IN A NEW BOOK TITLED GROW THIN, BUT HOW ? 
, DR . ANDREAS DUTTLER WARNS : " CORPULENCE IS THE 
DARK SIDE OF THE ECONOMIC MIRACLE . " REARGUARD ACTION . 
THE EXPLOSION OF VITAL STATISTICS IS AMPLY EVIDENT FROM THE ISLAND 
OF SYLT, WHERE PNEUMATIC NUDISTS JOUNCE ACROSS THE BEACHES, TO THE 
SPANISH COASTLINE, WHERE BULGY BRUNNHILDES HAVE ALREADY MADE THE AUTHORITIES REGRET 
THEIR DECISION NOT TO ENFORCE A LONGTIME BAN ON BIKINIS . 
WEST GERMANY'S MEN'S WEAR INDUSTRY IN RECENT YEARS HAS HAD TO 
ADD A NEW CLOTHING CLASSIFICATION, TACTFULLY DUBBED BOSS OR MANAGER SIZE 
; NEARLY A QUARTER OF ALL NEW CLOTHES ARE NOW BOUGHT 
BY CUSTOMERS OF MANAGERIAL GIRTH, WHILE SALES OF " NORMAL " 
SIZES ARE DIMINISHING . FRENCH GARMENT MANUFACTURERS WHO EXPORT TO GERMANY 
SELL A HIGHER PROPORTION OF JUMBO SIZES (16 TO 18) THERE 
THAN ANYWHERE ELSE . IN MOST OTHER COUNTRIES, ALSO, WELL-BUTTRESSED WOMEN 
STEER CLEAR OF SUCH REVEALING CLOTHES AS STRETCH SKI PANTS ; 
IN WEST GERMANY, ACCORDING TO THE WORLD-GIRDLING BOGNER STRETCHPANTS CONCERN, THERE 
IS A STEADY DEMAND FOR SLIPCOVER SIZES . MANY GERMAN WOMEN 
ARE FIGHTING A DETERMINED REARGUARD ACTION, NONETHELESS . SALES OF FOUNDATION 
GARMENTS HAVE QUADRUPLED SINCE 1950, AND SLIMMING PARLORS HAVE BECOME ALMOST 
AS THICK AS GERMANY'S BELOVED WHIPPED CREAM . IN BONN, WHERE 
A SESSION AT THE STYLISH SALON DER FIGUR RANGES FROM $6 
FOR A PLUMP PUBESCENT TO $125 FOR A WELLMARBLED DOWAGER, OWNER 
HELGA PIETSCH SIGHS : " NINETY PERCENT OF THE GERMAN WOMEN 
WHO COME IN HERE DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT A CALORIE IS 
. " UNCONSCIOUS EATING . WEST GERMANY'S GOVERNMENT IS DOING ITS 
LEVEL BEST TO TEACH THEM, FOR THE INCIDENCE OF ARTERIOSCLEROSIS AND 
OTHER FAT-LINKED AILMENTS IS INCREASING RELENTLESSLY . THE SOCIETY FOR NOURISHMENT 
SENDS 50 LADY DIETICIANS AROUND THE COUNTRY GIVING WEIGHT-REDUCING LECTURES, AND 
HAS LAUNCHED A COUNTER-PAUNCHING OFFENSIVE AIMED AT LEAVENING FACTORY MEALS . 
THE AVERAGE WEST GERMAN CALORIE INTAKE IS ACTUALLY BELOW U.S . 
AND BRITISH LEVELS, BUT SUCH STATISTICS DO NOT ACCOUNT FOR BEER, 
WHICH POURS DOWN TEUTONIC THROATS AT THE ANNUAL RATE OF 432 
GLASSES (100 CALORIES PER GLASS) FOR EACH MAN, WOMAN AND CHILD 
. BESIDES, THE AVERAGE GERMAN CONSUMES MORE STARCHES AND OTHER LIPOGENIC 
SUBSTANCES : 260 LBS . OF POTATOES, 155 LBS . OF 
BREAD AND 47 CHOCOLATE BARS EACH YEAR . GERMAN PALATES ARE 
NOT EASILY WEANED AWAY FROM SUCH BELT-STRAINING DELICACIES AS ROAST GOOSE 
(500 CALORIES FOR A GOOD-SIZED HELPING) OR KARTOFFELKLOSSE (MORE THAN 100 
EACH), THEIR FAMED POTATO DUMPLINGS . THROUGHOUT THE COUNTRY, WOMEN HOLD 
THEIR MIDMORNING KAFFEEKLATSCH AT PASTRY SHOPS THAT ARE AS RICH IN 
CALORIFIC TEMPTATION AS THE WITCH'S COTTAGE IN HANSEL AND GRETEL . 
TV HAS ALSO HELPED BRING THE COUNTRY TO POLYSATURATION POINT BY 
ENCOURAGING WHAT DOCTORS CALL " UNCONSCIOUS EATING . " TO GET 
THROUGH A POKER HAND WITH MAVERICK, GERMANS CONSUME VAST QUANTITIES OF 
PRETZELS AND PASTRIES, AND FILL THE GAPS BETWEEN SNACKS WITH ERFRISCHUNGSBONBONS, 
REFRESHMENT CANDIES . AND THEY ARE INCREASINGLY RELUCTANT TO TAKE EXERCISE 
. ASKS A GARMENT INDUSTRY OFFICIAL : " WHO WALKS NOWADAYS 
ANY MORE ? " TOP POTS . IF THE AUTOMOBILE IS 
A STATUS SYMBOL IN GERMANY, SO IS THE PAUNCH . LIKE 
JULIUS CAESAR ( " LET ME HAVE MEN ABOUT ME THAT 
ARE FAT " ), GERMAN VOTERS CONSIDER THAT SHEER HEFT MAKES 
A POLITICIAN MORE KREDITWURDIG, OR TRUSTWORTHY . WHILE KONRAD ADENAUER HAS 
REMAINED REASONABLY TRIM, MANY OTHER POLITICIANS HAVE VISIBLY GONE TO POT 
. BUNDESTAG LEADER HEINRICH VON BRENTANO WAS A SKINNY 150-POUNDER WHEN 
HE WAS FIRST ELECTED IN 1949, NOW WEIGHS AROUND 210 . 
FORMER WAR MINISTER FRANZ JOSEF STRAUSS WEIGHS ABOUT 270 LBS . 
MANY TOP OFFICERS, NOTABLY BUNDESWEHR INSPECTOR GENERAL FRIEDRICH FOERTSCH, ALSO SPORT 
UNMARTIAL POTBELLIES . UNDISPUTED CHAMPION IS ADENAUER'S CHOSEN SUCCESSOR, STOCKY (5 
FT . 10 IN . ECONOMICS MINISTER LUDWIG ERHARD, WHO WEIGHS 
ABOUT 220 LBS., BUT HAS SOARED FAR HIGHER ON OCCASION . 
WHENEVER A CRISIS THREATENS, SUCH AS THE METALWORKERS' STRIKE LAST MAY, 
GERMANS CRY : " LET THE FAT MAN HANDLE IT . 
" AFTER SETTLING THE STRIKE, ERHARD DREW ROAR OF APPROVAL WITH 
THE MODEST BRAG : " I THREW MY WHOLE WEIGHT INTO 
IT . " SOME OBSERVERS CONSIDER WAISTLINE INFLATION TO BE MERELY 
" A CULTURAL LAG " THAT WILL BE CORRECTED AS GERMANS 
ACCEPT THE IDEA THAT GOOD TIMES ARE THERE TO STAY . 
OTHERS, INCLUDING SOCIOLOGIST RENE KONIG, CONTEND THAT GERMAN CORPULENCE IS A 
SYMPTOM OF SUBCONSCIOUS ANXIETY AND GUILT . IF ONLY FOR THAT 
REASON, THERE SEEMS LITTLE LIKELIHOOD THAT GERMANS WILL EVER AGAIN WANT 
LEAN AND HUNGRY LEADERS . " A THIN ERHARD ? " 
ASKS KONIG . " NEVER . WHY, PEOPLE WOULDN'T BELIEVE IN 
WEST GERMANY'S PROSPERITY . " 